FF8: Behind the Scenes!
by Renegade Shadow
Summary: Rating for language and stuff. Prolly not funny, but just REVIEW IT! I need reviews. My first humor fic. Self-explanatory. LOTS of Zell-bashing!!


FINAL FANTASY VIII: BEHIND THE SCENES.  
  
Ok, I will warn you that this fic may seem random at first--because it is. It's a little something I originally wrote for my, er, original story, but I wanted to see what people thought of it. I don't own all this junk, cept for my screename. All I ask is that you REVIEW IT! PUT SOMETHING FOR THE LUVVA GOD! .........heh. Pleaze?  
  
--Some of the main characters may not be around for random reasons. Get used to it.--  
  
*Lunch Break*  
  
Rinoa: Do we have a new director yet?  
  
Irvine: I dunno...  
  
Squall: *yawns*  
  
Selphie: zzzzzz....  
  
Irvine: {she snores..?}  
  
Rinoa: *drums fingers on table*  
  
Voice: THAT'S IT! ENOUGH BOREDOM!  
  
All: *jump up*  
  
Rinoa: Who...is...that?!?!  
  
Voice: Duh, it's me, RS [renegade shadow--me!].  
  
Rinoa: Oh, the voice in my head that tells me to jump Squall..right?  
  
All: *stare*  
  
RS:Err...I'm not responsible for that. Anywayz *appears before them* I'm your new director. It's all downhill from here, guys!  
  
Irvine:.....why are you our director?  
  
RS: Cuz, um....I needed to put another fic on this freaking thing. And what better way than to convert characters from my original fiction into FF8 characters?! *eyes Squall* hee.  
  
Squall: Hey, I'm not complaining.  
  
RS: ^.^ {It's all good...}  
  
Rinoa: *One eye is bulging from its socket and she appears to be trying to transform into Griever in order to kill RS*  
  
Later...  
  
RS: CUT! Irvine, what is the deal?! How hard is it to put that wig on PROPERLY?! *Stomps over, presents a hot glue gun, and uses it to glue the wig to Irvine's head*  
  
Irvine: AAAAAAHHHHHHH! *steam hisses off his burning skin*  
  
RS: Stop it, you big BABY! *Throws hot glue gun behind her, -accidentally- hitting Zell in the process*  
  
Zell: *Eats it*  
  
All:.......  
  
Zell: *sees camera focused on him* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! *chases the poor defenseless cameraman and stabs him with a fork in the head, stomach and back*  
  
Cameraman: *dies*  
  
All:.......  
  
Zell: *grins and waves stupidly* Hi, folks!  
  
Rinoa: Uh. You just killed.....Phillip.  
  
Zell:....................................................................... ............................Huh? Did you say something?  
  
Rinoa: ....no.  
  
Zell: Ok.  
  
All:............................................  
  
RS: _ WE'RE BACK TO WHERE WE STARTED!  
  
*short pause*  
  
RS: Screw this. I'm taking a break. *eyes Squall*  
  
Rinoa: ....  
  
RS: *points outside the set of Garden* Hey, look, a dead bird!  
  
*Rinoa rushes out, and it seems Zell wants to see too, but he doesn't leave*  
  
RS:....hi Squall.  
  
Squall: ....Whatever...  
  
RS: *Now that Squall has said the one word that breaks her control--charges after him*  
  
Squall: *screams like a ninny*  
  
RS: SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!  
  
*Squall drops his gunblade with a sqeak like a mouse sucking helium and runs in the other direction*  
  
Zell: *Picks up gunblade* Hey, this is pretty realistic! *swings it around and chops Irvine's head off*  
  
Irvine's head: S**t.  
  
Zell: *drops gunblade, chopping off 3 of his toes, but doesn't notice* Cool! *picks up a stick and pokes Irvine's head, rolling it around on the floor*  
  
Irvine's Head: OW! Stop it, you chipmunk! Aah! Ow! *His own body steps on his face in effort to find his head--yells at it:* GET OFF OF MY--MRSHRUMPH- -FACE!!  
  
Rinoa: *back from trying to find the bird* This...is what I'm given to work with?!  
  
(Meanwhile, in the far-off reaches of space)  
  
RS: *breathes* SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQUUUUU AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLYYYYYY YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Squall: *flails around wildly in his space suit, but gets absolutely nowhere*  
  
RS: *catches up with him and grabs him by the arm, panting* Good thing I caught that shuttle! Now. I have to tell you that--  
  
Squall: *winces in fear*  
  
RS: Your shoe's untied.  
  
Both:........................................................  
  
Squall: You mean you chase me from the set of FF8, through NORG's blubber, up and over Mount Everest, through Midgar, over that silver-haired freaky guy who wanted to shish-kebab you, under that tree of sharp and fatally poisonous leaves--in autumn--between those two weirdos near Luca who were laughing like morons, through the inferno coming out of that rocket just so you could tell me my shoe was untied?  
  
RS: Mostly. But I followed you out of the rocket to tell you that your air helmet was open.  
  
Squall: .........*dies*  
  
RS: *eye twitches* What...ever....  
  
(Back on the set of FF8: Selphie and Irvine's head are high on coffee beans, pointing out the prettiest birdies. *don't even ask how Irvine's head is doing that* Quistis- -who just came in from the bathroom--is playing cards with Irvine's body and losing. Zell is doing his math homework.)  
  
Zell: Man! I don't get this!  
  
Rinoa: *Looks at his "work"* That's because you're holding it upside down. And one plus one is not another term for the "s" word.  
  
Zell: *ignores her* This is advanced stuff. You wouldn't understand.  
  
RS: T_T.....*sets his arm on fire*  
  
Zell: *grabs his feet in pain from where the gunblade chopped them off a half-hour ago* OOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!! MY TOES! I THINK SOMETHIN BIT THEM!  
  
(He continues to burn while crying over his precious big toe and that he spent a whole 3 minutes painting it the night before as a meteor slams into Quistis's and Irvine's Body's card table, sending shards of wood at Selphie and Irvine's Head)  
  
Irvine's Head: *looks around with wood splinter in his head*  
  
Selphie: *dies*  
  
Irvine's Body: *kicks table pieces*  
  
Irvine's Head: Dammit! I paid 40,000,000 gil for that table!  
  
Zell: *burns alive, dies*  
  
Quistis: Woah. What are the odd of a meteor hitting that table?  
  
RS: *climbs out of the sizzling crater* I don't know. What are the odd of me falling out of the sky and hitting it?  
  
---------- Ok, I KNOW, I KNOW THAT WAS COMPLETELY RANDOM! Yes, so it sucked. If you feel the desire to flame me, do so, for I do not care....I can always make you look as bad as Zell did....It's my first humor fic, so SUE ME!.........*I'm not talkin to you squaresoft ppl! Hee.* NOW CLICK THE BUTTON AND REVIEW!!!! :P ~RS~ 


End file.
